TOXIC PSYCHIC LIGHT
“The light serves me.”
I. GRANDIOSE
Self-important
Fantasies and delusions of power, specialness, success
Requires excessive admiration
Entitled: “I’m special and unique”
Highly reactive to real or perceived rejection
Demands loyalty (vs. earning it)
Extreme jealousy, envy, competitiveness, victimization
Lacks empathy (though knows how to fake it)
II. MANIPULATIVE
Exploits relationships for power, money, sexual/personal gain
Dramatic
Slick, smooth talker (and their words often doesn’t make sense)
Friendly & easy-going on the surface; hateful and hostile below the surface
Exaggerates
Chronic liar
Shames others—overtly and covertly
Lacks healthy shame for offensive behaviors
Fakes being helpful and virtuous
Power through intimidation
Faux-empathy gestures, e.g., “spiritual” buzz words/gestures (namaste, aho, etc.) Controlling (while trying to appear chill and relaxed)
“Above the law,” e.g., the rules/boundaries/agreements don’t apply to them Gaslighting (emotional, psychic, spiritual mind-fuck)
III. TOXIC/DESTRUCTIVE
Predatory: Sniffs out loneliness, vulnerability
Corrosive contempt and jealousy of teachers/leaders in their social and spiritual circles
Destructive to personal relationships & community
Divisive — pits people against each other
When held accountable for offensive behavior will accuse others
Fabricates drama and spreads lies within community
Semantically changes meaning of words to confuse the issue
Uses intimidation/threats/shaming to get their way
THE LIGHT OF SOURCE
“I serve the Light
”
Emotionally and spiritually sober/honest
Capable of self-reflection
Kind
Relational – A desire to know and be known by the other Welcoming
Warming
Inclusion
Emotional depth
Discerning but not excluding Caring
Integrated
Balanced
Humble (in a no-big-deal way)
Healthy shame: Can apologize and own their mistakes
Appropriately self-disclosing to create equality and healthy rapport
Creates community and connection
Respectful of all worlds of Grandmother Earth: plants, minerals, animals, humans, spirit
Self-aware
Helps you to remember your own inherent worth
Validating
Healthy Boundaries
Creates and nurtures
Compassionate towards self and others
(Recommended Reading: Women Who Love Psychopaths by Sandra Brown)
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