My Memoir: A Passage Through Spain
I want to share my good news with you: I’ve just launched my Indiegogo Funding Campaign for A Passage Through Spain!
A Passage Through Spain is the story of how the fully blossomed life I live today was catalyzed by a pivotal journey I took in my twenties. At that time, I felt a disturbing and compelling call from inside of me that pushed me to leave the life I’d known to find the life I had glimpsed in my dreams.
I did leave the life I’d known, my job, my boyfriend, my family, my country; it was a daunting gauntlet that my soul had thrown before me. Even so, I knew I had to take a big risk or regret a missed opportunity for the rest of my life. To say that I wanted to heed this calling would be incorrect, as every comfortable bone in my body wanted to stay right where I was, in the small, tidy realm of the familiar. Maybe you know that feeling?
A Passage Through Spain is my memoir of how I embarked on that soul-driven adventure. I finished the first draft just a few months ago, and now I’m leaping forward toward the next phase of its development. My memoir draws from the big, leather-bound journal, written in 1984-1985, in which I faithfully confided over that year of huge change.
So often, especially in the therapy subculture, we explore ways in which we can be of assistance to our younger selves. As I pored through the neatly, densely written pages of my journal, I soon realized that I was in the presence of a dear friend and a humble teacher who was healing me: my own younger self.
As I prepared the first draft of the manuscript during 2014, I felt indescribable joy every time I sat down to read and transcribe this magical missive from my twenty-six year old self. This young woman that I was, so new to the world in so many ways, blazed the trail for the life I’m living now, thirty years later.
This is Your Story
You know this story because it is your story. It is as archetypal as it is personal. You know the feeling of emptiness and futility when you’ve denied your heart’s calling. You know that staying small when your soul and your dreams are huge is heartbreaking. And you also know that somewhere in you there still burns the fire of transformation.
In my work as a shamanic healer and psychotherapist, I witness on a regular basis what I consider to be an epidemic of depression and soul-sickness in our culture. When we get disconnected from the powerful, transformative spark of passion that resides in the depths of our being, we begin to experience depression and a nameless sense of grief.
Re-reading my journal and beginning to craft its pages, I soon realized that A Passage Through Spain and my twenty-seven year old self had reignited the spark of adventure of me. And as I remembered something else essential: While this fire in your soul can be forgotten or distracted from, it cannot be destroyed.
I want A Passage Through Spain to be a lighthouse for you to light the way back to your wild authenticity, so that you are living your real life, not just dreaming about it. And if you’re already there, then I want you to want more of that for yourself, so that as the Buddha said, “you become a light unto yourself.”
Throughout the past twenty-five years, whenever I’ve shared this story with clients and audiences, I’ve found that it has a power beyond my telling of it. It seems to galvanize other people’s will to live a bigger life.
It’s as if others’ hunger for adventure and creativity gets sparked by the story of how I turned down the volume on my self-doubts (which were plentiful) and turned up the volume on my inner imperative that life be full, exciting, lived passionately with numerous forays into the unknown.
This May I am returning to Spain for a month to fulfill a promise I made to myself thirty years ago: to put into a publishable form this story of my journey through Spain and North Africa in search of a favorite author (watch my Indiegogo video) and more importantly, to find a more meaningful life.
I want to create a thoroughly researched, polished and compelling account of this adventure to share with you and others whose souls and dreams are huge.
The project is already underway. About a year ago, I began saving money in an envelope with “Spain” scribbled on it. At first, I thought, ‘This is for going back to Spain someday to do more research, but I don’t know when.’ And then a few months ago, I got it: ‘Someday’ is now! So those crumpled bills in the envelope are the basis for this project. Your contributions are the final flourish that will make this project fly!
That is why at this point I’m turning to you—my friends, family, clients and community— to help me fulfill this burning desire I have to get this project in motion.
The Objectives of this Indiegogo Campaign
My funding goal for this campaign is $8,000. The expenses tally up to quite a bit more, but having this amount to apply toward those expenses will be immensely helpful!
1. I would love your assistance with my month-long trip to Spain that begins this May, during which I will be researching and revising the freshly completed (in October of 2014) draft of A Passage Through Spain. Airfare (international and domestic in Spain) + accommodations + train fare + meals + airfare + car rental within Spain = approximately $7,500.
2. I would love your help with the next phases of preparing my manuscript for publication. This will include the cost of having my manuscript read by a professional editor ($1,200) and line-edited and proof read ($1,400).
$7,500 + $1,200 + $1,400 + Indiegogo/PayPal Fees* = $11,000
My funding goal: $8,000
Other Ways You Can Help
I know that for some of you, contributing with a financial donation isn’t possible. Please know that there are others ways you can contribute that would be enormously helpful. Here are a few of them:
1. Get the word out to your friends (especially your friends who love reading memoirs, travelogues and inspirational stories)
Here’s a partial list of people whom I think might be interested in A Passage Through Spain:
Lovers of …
• contemporary American literature (any fellow Paul Bowles-cultists out there?)
• coming-of-age literature
• women’s literature
• dreams that come true.
2. Use the Indiegogo share tools to post about my Passage Through Spain campaign with your Facebook and Twitter friends
My focus right now is on creating an excellent, compelling manuscript so that I can share with others this story that belongs to all of us who dream big and are determined to live big.
Risks & Challenges
Transcribing, writing and with hope one day publishing the story of my passage through Spain in the mid-80s is a promise I made to myself thirty years ago.
And returning to Spain, to find the people and places that are so much a part of that story, is something I’ve waited to do for twenty-five years. I was busy being a mom, going to graduate school, earning a living. I kept on telling myself that I couldn’t go back, that I couldn’t afford it, that that was all behind me. Until now. Several months ago the voice in my mind stopped saying “I can’t,” and began saying “I must.”
My twenty-seven year old self is now a guide to my now fifty-seven year old self and when this book is completed, she and I will be your guides and travel companions as your own spirit of adventure becomes reignited.
The Inspiration is Spreading
From the time I began writing in my journal in 1985 until I finished the first draft of the story in October of 2014, this story has commanded a fascination from those with whom I’ve shared it.
In November of 2014, I was invited by the Jung Center of Houston to lecture and give a workshop about the story and the central message of this book: “Sometimes you have to leave the life you’ve known so your real life can begin.”
And the inspiration is spreading. I’m thrilled to share with you that an excerpt of A Passage Through Spain will be published in Gargoyle Magazine later this year.
And now, my Indiegogo Campaign has launched.
Here we go!